YouTube Drama > Reality TV

I’ve been following YouTube drama for about a year now. Mainly one specific corner of YouTube that I previously didn’t care too much for. I’d mention specific YouTubers, but the two in particular that I enjoy watching their lives spiral out of control to make myself feel better are also the type that will Google themselves obsessively and then send their personal army of teens ages 10-16 out to swamp and overwhelm and attack anyone who speaks of them negatively on the internet. I’ve seen this happen a LOT over the last year and I’d rather not deal with it. So we’ll just call them Anna and Rick. I would use their real names, or their YouTube handles, or any other name they use that may be more obscure – but as stated, they are obsessive about Googling themselves. Which we’ll get to in a bit how that plays into all that drama.

Now then, let’s start with Rick. Mainly because I found out about Anna due to watching the downward spiral that is Rick.

Rick has been doing YouTube for nearly as long as YouTube has existed. He’s made a LOT of money through ad revenue. He became super popular for the “lol so random” style of comedy that’s usually a favorite of pre-teens and young teens. There were a few videos that became so popular they were viral for a while. Well, over time he built up a MASSIVE following of over 2 million subscribers. Unfortunately a lot of his “comedy” started to dwindle when drama in his real life started (a divorce and numerous scandals) and rather than keep his private life private, he started airing his dirty laundry through his YouTube channel. This made him really popular with the pre-teen and young teenagers because “omg he so gets us!” and capitalized on the whole “emo” trend. More and more his multiple channels became more about his life and the drama in it, and how everyone hates him for being honest and truthful and they’re just jealous of his success – and less about actual comedy.

Near the end of last year another YouTube drama whore came to my attention. Anna. Anna is known, apparently, for rooting out bullshit. And for making 20+ videos on any given topic wherein she him-haws around about stuff but only gives a small nugget of information that may or not be accurate. She latches onto other YouTube dramas and drama whores and sucks from the tit of clickbait until it runs dry and she needs to find another target for her attention. She deliberately stirs up drama where there is none, and pretty much is a garbage human being who claims to have illnesses that if she truly did have them, on the best pain management days she certainly wouldn’t be able to push out 10+ videos a day, plus a minimum of 1-3 live streams a day, plus in every single video and stream be flapping her arms about like a complete and utter fool. If the conditions she claims to have all at once are legitimate, there’s no way she would be able to function half of what is shown on camera as the majority of the illnesses she claims to have seriously affect mobility – and the combination she claims to have not only restricts movement but also would have her bedridden on the best of days. Now I know treatment affects people in different ways and I’m no expert on the subject but given the claims, some of which are conditions I also deal with, they simply cannot be managed using severely diluted homeopathic medicine only. That’s like taking nothing but placebos. Sure, mentally you believe it works and the whole mind over matter thing, but that’s not going to fix the degenerative diseases you claim to have. Your bones are still going to disintegrate, and your joints are still going ot get massively inflamed, and your migraines that are getting worse and worse (so you claim) are obviously not going away or easing up but in fact are becoming a bigger problem the longer they go untreated. Anyway, I digress.

Anna came to my attention because Anna made 50-ish videos about Rick late last year when yet another scandal had come up surrounding Rick. This time rather than about his love life, it was about one of his websites and encouraging underage girls to post intimate photos of themselves so he could judge their bodies on YouTube. (Intimate meaning bra and panties, or less.) The youngest that anyone had found out about as 12 years old. He claimed he only picked the people that were 18 or older for his multiple body shaming videos (though he calls them “empowering”), but that was proven wrong when someone noticed he used a photo of a 16 year old. That caused people to dig into his website, believing there may be more underage girls so that he could be reported to the police. Before anyone could report him the website was taken down for a few days and purged of incriminating evidence before being put back online.

Anna caught wind of this, and her entire brand is based on, like I said, sucking the tit of clickbait and YouTube drama whores. The two ended up in a spat over who was the more desperate drama whore. Rick sent out a faked Cease and Desist letter that Anna believed was legit for a time, and she did back off making videos of Rick for a while. Recently she’s made 3 or 4 about him but has mainly focused on a child abuse scandal she “helped” uncover (she didn’t do shit but cause more drama so she could get views and collect that sweet ad revenue), and dealing with some fallout of drama about her “illnesses” among other personal drama people have finally brought down upon her.

She’s made more videos than usual per week now however because of the Adpocalypse tat started earlier this year. For simplicity sake the adpocalypse was the event wherein advertisers started pulling their ads and funding because they didn’t want their brands associated with certain types of videos plus YouTube changed their system around a few times which caused creators to have videos quietly demonetized or their entire channels placed into age restriction mode which cut their viewership drastically. As a result people like Anna and Rick had their videos demonetized and, in Rick’s case, their channel(s) placed into restricted mode.

Now, why does this matter? Because YouTube drama whores thrive off ad revenue. The more subscribers and views they have, the bigger their egos get. The bigger the egos, the more the drama they post online or scandals they get involved in. When those numbers begin to drop, they make multiple videos filled with guilt tripping their viewership. In some more extreme cases, like in Rick’s, they threaten to kill themselves if their viewers don’t donate to their Patreon page.

Watching YouTube drama is better than watching reality TV. Reality TV is 100% scripted, and while much YouTube drama is also scripted in some way, it has a very different feel to it. You know ahead of time that these people are only in it for the money (that is, if they can even have ads on their videos at that point) and for the fame. You know that the person you see on screen isn’t usually how they really are in real life – because in real life they are much much worse than what you see.

Now, I’m not saying that everyone who Vlogs on YouTube is a drama whore. Because there’s honestly some great content creators who, all they do is talk about their lives and their dreams and things like that. There’s a few I’ve followed for years who are actually just as they are on screen only in real life, they might swear a bit more because they don’t have to watch their language for the kiddies that might be watching. But then there’s the darker corner of YouTube, where the drama whores congregate and snap at one another. It’s like watching a tank of piranhas and putting a single small piece of meat in the water just to watch them fight over it.

There is a darker side to all of this unfortunately. As I mentioned before the two that I specifically watch, Anna and Rick, have a large following of pre-teens and young teenagers. This is an age of experimentation. Of trying to figure out not only puberty but also yourself. What kind of things you like, the kind of person you want to be, and a lot of a person’s personality is shaped by the things they hear, see, and do at this age. An age where if your idol will just give you five minutes, or glance in your direction, you’ll do anything to keep their attention. Some girls will post nearly nude photos of themselves to a forum just to get a single word back from their idol. Others will blindly do anything they’re told because it proves that they’re “a real fan”. Five years ago, I would have been pissed if my favorite YouTubers were put into restricted mode. As a teenager I’d have been even more pissed and lied about my age just to watch their videos (which let’s be honest – anyone who grew up with the internet has done this – and those too old to have done this grew up in the age of fake IDs so it’s not exactly a new concept here). Now, however, I have the perspective of being a parent. And this perspective changes a LOT of things. For instance if my son were aged 10-16, I would not allow him to watch Rick’s videos. Ever. Not until he’s old enough where I can’t do anything about it and he’s old enough to understand that Rick isn’t exactly “normal”. And if he DID happen to watch Rick’s videos, or videos like Rick’s, then I’d sit him down and have a very long talk about personal responsibility and the reality of whatever the video(s) was/were about rather than what he saw portrayed. I know, as a parent, I can’t keep my child from 100% of everything that will be bad for him, but I can teach him to know the difference between right and wrong, and how to spot harmful content and people to avoid. Because I don’t want to open a bank statement or a credit card bill to discover that my kid’s donating a lot of money a month behind my back to someone who keeps threatening suicide if their “real fans” don’t give them money.

And that’s a very big problem as well here. Something that not only irritates me but frightens me about certain types of YouTubers with large followings of young teens and kids. They could be really chill and awesome role models like Markiplier (who legitimately does care about his fans), or they could be utter garbage fire of human beings like Anna and Rick (who routinely use their fans as a personal army to attack detractors and to fund themselves through avenues like Patreon by honestly making their young fans believe if they don’t get at least $1 from you then you’re not a real fan and they’re going to off themselves). I mean hell, usually I don’t shy away from naming and shaming, but here I am using made up names for these people because I don’t want to contribute to the cycle of abuse they use on their young fans by becoming another target for them to be aimed at.

That’s just fucking sad.

On the plus side, I get to watch – for free because I use multiple adblock extensions – YouTube drama whores cannibalize themselves without having to pay for cable or anything, and legitimately know that what I’m watching may be scripted but it’s much closer to reality than any reality TV show could possibly get.

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“I hope senpai will notice me!” or: Stop trying to get my attention.

Lately in my social media excursions, forum conversations, and general Tumblring, I’ve noticed more than I usually do this constant need for attention from people. Some of it was a person clamoring for my attention (which actually got me a few more youtube views. I really should do a new video soon) and some of it was watching others clamor for another person’s attention.

I hope senpai will notice me is a meme, but basically it’s thrown around these days in it’s original meme context, but also in a derogatory way to simply say “you’re just doing it for attention”.

On social media, but mostly Tumblr, this has never been more true. As of late, I’ve witnessed quite a scene unfold in one of the smaller Tumblr communities. I will not bore you with the details of the community, but suffice to say it is a reactionary movement. It sprung up as a sort of opposition to the extremism found in modern social justice movements.

In this particular community, someone was singled out and mocked. During this week or so, people came to the person’s defense, and they too were mocked. Some learned how stupid and childish they had been, and realized the reactionary movement they had been drawn into actually does more harm than good, and they decided to leave the movement and be better people. These people found that removing themselves from the constant fighting over trivial bullshit (such as arguments about sexless, genderless, raceless shapeshifting space rocks as well as magical ponies) and just enjoying their time online by looking at things they actually enjoy and like, they were far less stressed, and overall happier people.

Well, some of the people who left this “movement” were rather popular bloggers on Tumblr. They were always the ones who were tag-teamed in to take over when a person could not continue an argument (usually because the person involved had no idea what they were even talking about to begin with). But now that they had removed themselves from the “discourse”, others began vying for the top of the billing to replace them. One person in particular went above and beyond, going into people’s inboxes and sending anonymous hate to start up trouble, while another person went around tagging a user who was already dealing with a horrible situation – just to stir up trouble and look like a “good guy”. All so they could get the attention of ONE person. Mind you, the ONE person who’s attention they were trying to get is a 23 year old adult who spends the better part of his day arguing with teenagers about My Little Pony and Steven Universe, and not just on Tumblr either. And the 2 who went around trying to cause trouble in order to look like the “good guy”, are 18 and 19 respectively. All adults. Who choose to spend their free time fighting over cartoons and issues they know little to nothing about and who berate and punish those who either don’t agree, or who are in the community but express a differing opinion – no matter how slight a difference it is.

In the course of trying to get this person’s attention, these 2 individuals in particular directly caused the doxxing of one girl who otherwise would have been left alone had she not been tagged into an argument, and the other dragging everyone under the bus with her because no one was going to take her seriously because she is a well known drama queen and hypocrite. Drawing out what would have lasted maybe a week into now I believe week 3 of drama and discourse.

But this kind of behavior is not limited to the social media blogging site Tumblr. And not just to people and situations that are observed from the outside. Last week on Facebook, an individual I crossed keyboards with last March, tried once again to catch my attention. Mentioning me and my videos directly in her nonsensical rant about how the pagan community is secretly being taken over and, if I believe I’ve read the context of the word salad correctly, there is already a Ministry of Magic that is taking people to Azkaban? Honestly, it was very hard to read her Facebook post. But this wasn’t the first attempt to get my attention. It was maybe the third? I know of one other at least, that a friend told me about. Some sort of picture proving she and another individual were, in fact, 2 different people. (This stems from the situation in March when not only myself, but MANY OTHERS, noticed that she and this other individual were NEVER around at the same time, and had the exact same reactions to every single thing. Same typos, same everything. So people began to suspect that the 2 people were really 1 person pretending to be 2. We now know, long after the picture was first posted.)

gabbyagainjfc

Screen capture thanks to a friend in the event that the comment is ever deleted.

Regardless, against my better judgement, I did respond this time to the attempt to grab my attention. I was polite and civil. I thanked them for the publicity of my videos, I pointed out how i had done my best to avoid them, their friends, and anything they were directly associated with. I even went so far as to wish them, their friends, and their endeavors luck in the future. I mean, I’ll post a screen capture of my response here as well. I honestly do wish them the best, but also wish to be kept out of the drama that follows them around like a plague. I also have held true to my word that I have not been back to the woman’s Facebook page ever since. (Though that has not stopped anyone else from driving by to throw popcorn and watch the drama unfold.)

But this brings me to wonder, why do people crave attention from strangers so badly? What is it about anonymous praise that drives an individual to extreme lengths just to get one specific person’s attention? Once a person has proven themselves, why turn around and continue to prove yourself when there is nothing left that is needed to be proven? These people do these things almost like it is an addiction. When they go unnoticed, their behaviors get more and more bold, more and more extreme. With little regard to themselves or others that get caught in the middle along the way.

To give them this attention will only reinforce the behavior, but to not give them the attention will only push them to more dangerous extremes. And this isn’t even for important issues, or trying to draw attention to overlooked and under-reported causes. No, these kinds of people thrive off attention, even negative, and will argue about children’s cartoons or conflate legitimate spiritual beliefs with works of fiction – just to get a specific individual’s attention.

Paypal is a bitch, but hey it’s better than nothing. (My feelings and thoughts on Prepaid Cards)

Firstly, I’m annoyed that I can’t use Google Wallet like you can Paypal for online stores. Like, as in using it instead of Paypal to sell stuff on my own website. Used to be able to do that, but they stopped offering that feature and shut down that arm of GW. As far as prepaid cards go though, it’s soooooooo much better than most of the others out on the market. That’s why it’s in my top spot for prepaid cards. The only catch is you can only really receive money. As in, someone has to get a Google Wallet (which is free, btw, with EVERY Gmail account) in order to send money to your Google Wallet. OR you have to link a bank account/debit card (like with Paypal) and transfer money from your own account into it. So, that sucks.

However, it’s a handy little thing to have if you’ve got a kid and you want to give them money, but don’t want to give them cold hard cash. Like, if your kid’s away at college and needs money, it’s a quick and easy transfer, plus they can use the card like a regular debit card. Can even get cash back when they need it, too. Yeah, people give Wallet Card users funny looks because it doesn’t look like a standard debit or credit card. The number’s on the back of the card, as well as the MasterCard logo. And there’s no fees. AND if you try to buy an item for $1.01 but all you have on the card is $1, the transaction will not process because the funds just aren’t there.

Now, I say Google Wallet is my top fave. My second is the Bluebird from Wall-Mart and American Express. And I like it for all of the same reasons as I like the Google Wallet. Unlike the Google Wallet, however, you can receive direct deposit of paychecks and government checks (SSI, SSDI, tax refund), and it basically serves as a bank account with an actual routing and account number. All checks have to be pre-approved before you use them, so that sucks. Then again, nobody really uses checks these days. The plus side to this card is the Bluebird App, which keeps track of your balance, and can locate nearby ATMs that you can use for free (if you have direct deposit) or for a small fee (if it’s out of the assigned region and company, etc.). The major downside to this card is that in order to add funds you must have either another Bluebird user send them to you from THEIR account OR link your personal checking to the card and reload it from there. The terminals at Wall-Mart where you can get cash free or reload your card is almost ALWAYS out of order (this is not just at one location, but FIVE locations that I’ve visited!) Another pro for this card is that you can have a sub-account. When I got my card (for work) you could have up to 4 sub-accounts. Now I think it’s like 1 or 2. But the purpose of the sub-accounts is that you can give it to your kids or other family members (so long as they are 13 or over). Again, you can load the card from the main Bluebird account and the funds are there for the sub-account holder to use. The downside to the sub-accounts are that you can’t use it as a debit unless you are at an ATM, and you can’t add funds yourself. You must send an alert to the main account holder that you need more money, and then they send you more money. The BIGGEST downside to this card is that it’s an AMEX…… and hardly anyone takes AMEX. Especially small businesses. VISA and MasterCard are industry standard, and once in a while you’ll find someone who takes Discover.

Now, why am I saying all of this about 2 prepaid cards as if I’m trying to convince you to get one (which I’m not, btw. I’m just trying to sort out my feelings on these products myself, as well as Paypal)? Because Paypal is a bitch, and they’re holding about $80 that I got off selling stuff on eBay until November 10th, and I’m gonna have to pay what I’ve spent in shipping back to my mom, bringing my profit down to about $60. But in the meantime, I’ve still gotta send out the stuff I’ve sold. Now, Paypal wouldn’t hold my money as long if I had, you guessed it, the Paypal Prepaid Card!

Now, I am a fan of prepaid cards, because I don’t like tapping my banking. Things are tight year round, and every penny counts. So the bank bank is for bills and household stuff. Whereas prepaids are the fun money. But there is no way in hell I’m going to try and get the Paypal card again. The last time I tried, I ended up fighting Paypal for nearly 2 years over the proof of my identity, despite sending them ample evidence that yes I am who I am. Yes, my name was legally changed. And yes, that really is my driver’s license and SSN. And no, I wasn’t going to send sensitive and personal information to an unsecured e-mail address. And this was after having a Paypal for over 8 years, and never EVER having an issue. So I ended up having to close out that Paypal entirely. Which sucked. Now I have a new Paypal, because it was the only way to get my Fiverr money and it’s how TextBroker pays writers. So, since I have it, I figured why the hell not sell on eBay. I mean, I’ve got all this stuff lying around and no pawn shop will take any of it. Might could get some extra holiday cash. So that’s what I’ve done.

But I will be damned if I get desperate enough for the money to finish pending and become available that I stoop down to getting the PayPal Prepaid Card again. Plus, it has fees. And as I stated above in my diatribe about 2 other prepaid cards, I prefer cards with no fees at all. So…. there’s that.

So…… Ebay.

Now that I’ve finally gotten Pay-Pal straightened out after 2 years of fighting with them to prove that yes, my last name is my last name since I got married and yes, the SSN matches, and yes I am who I say I am…. I’ve finally been able to go back to e-bay. Not the best option, I know. But I’ve got a LOT of manga to offload and the Tumblr selling blog was a big bust so…..

Yeah. You can check out what all I’ve got posted here on my seller page. I’ll be adding a link to my sidebar for it of course. I won’t be posting exclusively about it, of course. That breaks wordpress rules. But it’ll be there in case anyone wants to see what all I’ve got. Plus, I’ll probably do like a post a few times a month about everything that’s getting added or sold so people know about the changes in inventory and so forth.

So I’m selling my stuff for money. Christmas Money.

So. During the mega cleaning, I came to realize I have a bunch of stuff I don’t use and don’t need. I also looked at finances, and realized “Hey, if I can unload some of this stuff, I can do a little extra special shopping this year!”

xmascashSo here it is folks. My project to sell off my stuff for some extra scratch. Right now I’m working on offloading my manga collection, and I’m gonna throw in some Oracle Card decks as well. Some DC comics at some point, and other assorted things I come across that I don’t want anymore.

All payments processed with Google Wallet.

I DO NOT accept: concealed cash, check, money order, or Paypal (me and Paypal are NOT on speaking terms at the moment.)

I might offer mini readings via Skype as well at some point before the holidays to help bring in some extra holiday cash.

I plan to sell my manga collection, oracle card decks, some random arts and crafts projects I’ve done, and anything else I decide I don’t need anymore. So yeah, that’s pretty much it. If it works out okay this year, I might just do this every year.

Sore Spots 4/4/15 – By Rae Moonwind Reynolds

Something has happened in my life recently where this is extremely relevant. I’m not going to detail it here, as I’ve already spent too much of my day on it, and I’m stressed to the point I really don’t want to eat. (But I will, because my body needs nourishment.) My good friend and former coworker Rae told me to read this. And yeah, it’s completely relevant to what I am dealing with in my personal life right now. The copyright on it says that I can distribute it so long as it remains unaltered and the copyright notice is intact. So here you go.

Sore Spots 4/4/15

As spiritual people we SAY that we understand that if someone creates a fear or anger reaction in us that person is being a mirror for us. The appropriate response is to ask, “What do I see in you that I also see in me?” Sounds great in theory, doesn’t it? But the truth is when someone sticks a sharp, pointy, object into our open wounds and stirs it around, the last reaction we tend to have is, “Thank you for being my mirror.” Its more like, “Stop that! You are hurting me!” That, followed with all kinds of feelings of being picked on and victimized. Of course we blame the other person and make them out to be awful people. And let’s be honest. Sometimes that other person really is an awful person. There are people out there who seem to feed off of pushing other people’s buttons/sore spots. Its like they have heat seeking missiles that assist them in finding the most tender area, and BAM. Explosive, gut churning, strike accomplished while they stand there an smirk at having hit their target.

Still, the mirror information is good information to have. The truth is, your sore spots are only walking bull’s eyes as long as they are sore. When you poke your own sore spots and get them to drain and heal, they no longer put off a signal for crappy people’s heat seeking missiles to find. The ironic thing about your sore spots is that while it is your big old pus filled wound, a lot of times, your friends just don’t see it. Or better yet, they view it as one of your great strengths that they admire while you are trying to hide it and apologize for it. Now THAT, is awkward.

This lifetime has been all about healthy interactions with other people for me. I had the opportunity to be raised by codependent, dysfunctional people who support abusive behaviors in others by making excuses for them and turning a blind eye. That set me up for abusive relationships in adulthood. My life lessons have been all about learning to trust myself to use discernment to either move toward people or away from them depending on the healthiness of the situation. When I view my soul contracts in this manner, I feel profound gratitude for all of the people who have been willing to fulfill those contracts through our interactions. They weren’t all pleasant. Instead of being able to see clearly that this was as simple as a set of life lessons with accompanying soul contracts for interaction, I developed a wound that said I couldn’t keep people long term. (I would imagine there are a number of people who will be laughing when they read that. See? ) Then I had “close friends” who sent their heat seeking missiles into that wound, or more like just shoved sharp sticks in it and stirred it. No. It was not nice and real friends do not do that. Still, the fact remains, they were only able to attack the target because there was one.

Recently I have had the opportunity to interact with someone I distanced myself from some time ago. I have always second guessed myself on that distancing. The “friend” who owns the sharp stick helped me with the second guessing considerably. After getting to spend time around this individual after a couple of years have passed, I was shocked. I was shocked that I had ever second guessed my choice to terminate the relationship. I had been involved with someone who ridicules, condemns, and criticizes me constantly. There is no kindness, no love, no respect, in this person’s words. I was informed of how fortunate my daugher and I are to have this person in our lives and was told why we should feel honored to have such a magnificent being take an interest in us. As I listened. And listened. And listened. I realized that if I walked out right then, this person would still be talking and would be oblivious to the fact that the audience had been lost. Its not like there was ever any desire on this person’s part to know what I am thinking or feeling, or even who I am.  Why, exactly had I second guessed my decision to not have this person in my life? Better yet, why had I spent so much time making excuses for his behavior and turning a blind eye to it? I was still hanging onto looking at the positives and hoping he would change. An epiphany struck: I made the right choice. I CAN trust myself to use discernment and to make good choices about who I allow in my life and who I don’t. If this was a good choice, then it doesn’t have anything to do with not being able to keep people around. It has to do with choosing who is worth keeping around. Oh my God. I spent a couple of days just reveling in, “I make good choices. I can trust myself.” The wound quickly began healing.

Then during lunch with friends who have been around for years, it was brought to my attention that someone else I had distanced myself from, then second guessed myself for doing that, has not moved forward with life in a productive manner. The drug and alcohol issues have gotten worse over time instead of better like I had truly believed they would. Again, there is confirmation that I can trust myself to make good decisions about who I am spending time with. The wound completely closed up after that one. I don’t think there is even any residual scar tissue in spite of this being such a long standing wound.

I have been watching a friend during this same time period I have been healing that wound for myself. She really believes her sore spot is an unbearable flaw. It is what all of us around her see as her greatest strength. Getting to sit back and observe her struggling with her sore spot has been educational. I am seeing that those who are poking sticks in her sore spot are exploiting the one weak area that they can because they are afraid of her strength. They are afraid she sees them clearly when they have something to hide. So they poke to knock her off balance and keep her from being able to get a good look at them in the midst of her distraction. I finally reached out and energetically yanked her by the hair out of concern that she was going to miss important information about the person poking. She is intuitive and needed to trust her feelings in this situation instead of second guessing. It was nice to have an opportunity to do for someone else what I wish had been done for me. That in itself was healing for my sore spots.

All within this same two week time frame of processing this life lesson, I had a client call me for an hour session. She is overweight. She is certain that all of her co-workers laugh at her for being overweight and is sure that everyone thinks she is stupid. I might add that the  position she has held for over 9 years is high level and at the  very least proves there is nothing incompetent about this woman. I was blown away that such an amazing woman’s sore spot was feeling stupid. Whoa. And the weight thing? What a wonderful sore spot to look at. We all know that girl who has trouble walking and breathing at the same time because she is so heavy. But she owns it and her sexuality and always, always has some guy on the hook who just adores her. What’s the difference between these two women? For one her weight is her sore spot. For the other, it isn’t an issue at all.

People in general are like vultures who circle when they smell death. Sorry. But its true. The best way to stop being a  moving target is to heal our own sore spots. We also need to start recognizing that when there is something in us that is getting repeatedly poked, that is our cue to take a closer look and see what we need to do start the healing process for that particular sore spot. If it doesn’t exist, it can’t be poked. Damn. That just blows our need to be the victim to hell, doesn’t it? Yes, this is another opportunity to grow up a little bigger and take personal responsibility for our own crap instead of pointing fingers. Those of us that came here to experience human life so that we can evolve at a soul level (yes, that would be you) will move along a little faster and more efficiently when we can get to a point where the knee jerk reaction becomes “That hurt/upset me/made me angry. What do I need to heal inside of myself?” instead of the knee jerk, “You asshole.” Lol. Who am I kidding. There will probably always be the latter reaction first. But we can start practicing having a quick second reaction in the form of looking to heal ourselves.

That saying, some people enter your life for a reason, some for a season, some for a lifetime… I have had some fun with that over the past few days, making a list. What a different perspective this is. I like it. No where in that cute little quote does it imply that if people are reason or season categories is it a bad thing or “your fault”. After healing up such a particularly yucky sore spot, I don’t feel so intimidated by my other sore spots. What I am finding is that I have a profound love and appreciation for those other sore spots. My thoughts have been going toward thanking those sore spots for existing every time I feel them, like an energetic hug. Then I tell them that as much as I appreciate their service to me, they are no longer needed and can go. As a result absolutely everything in my experience right now feels so much lighter. Its good.

Big hugs and thank yous to all of my reasons, seasons, lifetimes, and pokey stick holders. Much love to all of you.

Copyright 2015 © Rae Moonwind Reynolds. All rights reserved. You may copy and distribute this material as long as you do not alter it in any way, the content remains complete and you include this copyright notice.